how do you give a bj
get a bible and start reading it out loud i promise u will blow him away with the word of the lord
Hairdresser: do you like it?
Me: yes thank you
*goes home and cries*
- me: this is worse than that time I watched family guy
- *camera cuts to me watching family guy*
- me: this sucks
damnit grandpa it’s 2021, they’re not spiders anymore, they’re arachnid americans and more importantly my friends
I wish none of you were sad
funerals are so depressing. i want a parade when i die. cupcakes. airhorns. dancing. maybe even a murder mystery game with me as the person who was murdered.
you want to put the fun back in funeral